Valentine's Day in Mouvember

If you had told me 3 months ago that Bobby Valentine would be the manager of the Boston Red Sox next season, I would've laughed so hard that I'd poop in my pants and blame the smell on John Lackey. Now, ladies and gentlemen, we're staring at a strange reality.

Valentine has officially been "hired" as the next manager of the Boston Red Sox. I use "hired" in quotes because it was more like he got the job by process of elimination. After Sveum was

swooped up by the Chicago Theos, Mike Maddux bowed out graciously, Alomar and Louvullo mysteriously fell off the face of the earth, and Gene Lamont's 15 seconds of fame were up...all that remained was Bobby V.

Now, I'm not trying to make it out like the man was the last human being on this planet with any sliver of coaching experience, and the Sox were "stuck" with him. No way. If anything, Bobby V had what all of the other candidates didn't have: a veteran coaching resume with championship winning success. Ok, ok. So the championship he won was with the Chiba Lotte Marines of the Japanese Pacific League. Asia series, not the World Series. Still, Bobby V has the track record of taking his ballclubs far into the postseason. In 2000, his lovable loser Mets made it all the way to the actual World Series - only to get pushed aside by the unlovable loser Yankees.

When it comes to knowledge of the game, not a lot of people know the sport like he does. As an analyst on ESPN's Baseball Tonight for the past few years, Bobby V has shared his experiences with the viewers and given everybody a chance to see what the sport is like from the inside out.

His tenure at ESPN only magnified his level of likeability in the eyes of America. Sure, we will always have the famous 1999 Mustache incident (one of my favorite sports moments of all time). But there's something about his half-neurotic, half-quirky personality that we got to see on a daily basis that became contagious. (Plus, he fought Herm Edwards. )

There you have it. He's experienced, knowledgeable and likeable. So what's wrong with Bobby V?

For the Red Sox, everything.

For one, he hasn't managed in a few years - and hasn't managed in the MLB since 2002. We'd like to think coach-turned-analyst-turned-coach can work out, but just ask Barry Melrose how that went. Ok, ok, the NHL is a different beast, so we can't compare apples to oranges. But let's see how long Buck Showalter lasts in that black hole that is Baltimore.

Sure, unlike Showalter, Bobby V is coming into a franchise that was built to be a playoff contender year in and year out. And with a payroll in the top 5 of MLB, the manager should have an easier time coasting right through 162 games and into October...right?

Wrong.

In 2002, the Valentine-led Mets' payroll ranked 6th in the league at $94.6 million. The team was stacked with should-be all-stars like Mike Piazza, Mo Vaughn, Roberto Alomar, Rey Ordonez...even my boy John Valentin was soaking up some playing time. They had just won the pennant two years earlier and enjoying 5 straight years of plus-500 baseball. Then came the reports of marijuana abuse and unruliness in the clubhouse. The team struggled, missed the playoffs, and Bobby V was fired - with the explanation from the front office being that Valentine couldn't control his team in the clubhouse. Sound familiar?

Then there was Japan. Valentine enjoyed success for the first few years there, even managing to capture a title. Then, in 2009, he was forced out by the club president - even under heavy support from local fans.

As much as I love the guy, there's something in my gut that says this isn't the right pick. Not now, not for this team. This is a Sox club that last year proved themselves to be nothing more than a bunch of overpaid spoiled brats. And we're summoning Bobby Valentine in to come change that collective mindset? If anything, Valentine will only make this team more susceptible to that type of behavior. History hasn't shown me a reason to believe otherwise.

He was revered in Flushing for a few years before getting flushed out. Just like he was revered in Chiba City for a few years before getting chased out. How long until he's tossed out with the tea in Boston?

Game 1 Recap: Reality Bites

21 years of waiting and it all comes down to a blown off-sides call and a...bitten finger?

The mood for Game 1 of the Stanley Cup finals - the first for Boston since 1990 - reminded me very much like college graduation week for me, only a year ago...You trudge through a couple decades of schooling, experiencing many ups and downs along the way, work hard during the final years, survive through all of that hard work, and then one day you wake up like it was all a blur and you're standing in a robe on a big stage somewhere...Ok so maybe the reason I was blurry wasn't all from "hard work", but you catch my drift.

The Bruins coasted through a couple decades, certainly experienced their ups and downs (maybe a few more downs than ups in that span), worked very hard during the past few years (Re: a few more downs), survived through 3 hard-fought series over 6 or 7 weeks, and then BOOM: they're standing in sweaters on the biggest stage in professional hockey somewhere...in Canada.

And while I was in a blur thinking about the Bruins actually being in the Stanley Cup finals for the first time in my life (that I can actually remember), the Bruins were in their own blur when the puck dropped in Vancouver.

The Canucks came out flying - much like everyone thought they would - getting great look after great look at Timmy Thomas very early on. Fortunately for the B's, however, Timmy Thomas came out much like everyone thought he would - on. his. head. Tim Thomas played 59:41.5 minutes of unstoppable goaltending. One phenomenal save after another phenomenal save. This game was just another example of why Thomas is the surefire winner of the Vezina Trophy - an award he is bound to win over counterpart Roberto Luongo. Yes, Luongo earned the shutout tonight, but let's be honest, he didn't face nearly as many difficult shots as Thomas did. The Canucks pelted the American netminder from all sides of the ice. The Bruins...well...shot the puck 36 times. In fact, this Game 1 reminded me much of the Montreal series Game 1: not a lot of great scoring opportunities for the B's and a stellar effort from Thomas wasted down the drain.

The silver lining here is that the Bruins historically have woken up out of this offensive funk later in the series. The grey lining is that the Bruins have yet to wake up out of the deep coma that is their so-called power play.

I heard much ado tonight from postgame analyzers about how the PP seems to be getting better. Well, I got news for you, analyzers: now is not the time to be getting "better" at any aspect of play. That's what the regular season is for. This is the Stanley Cup finals, for crying out loud! The Bruins need to be 100% at everything they do or else stay home. Look at the Canucks - they're 1st in PP, as well as most other offensive categories. It's no wonder they are where they are. The Bruins? Well they are where they are because of hard work around the boards, making the right passes around the net, and making the necessary plays in the defensive zone...under one condition:it must be full strength, 5 on 5 play.

Sure, they've "improved" over the course of the playoffs on the PP, going from 0 goals in the MTL series to 2 in the PHI series to 3 in the TB series. But how many of those were systematic power play goals? How many of those were clutch power play goals? That is, how many of the 5 PP goals that the Bruins have scored this playoff were goals that they should have scored and/or NEEDED to score. I distinctly remember their first PP goal coming on a 5on3 at the very end of a game vs. the Flyers in the second round. Systematic? Yes. Clutch? No. The Bruins had wrapped up the game by then. I can't remember the B's scoring a PP goal in which they should have scored and more importantly, REALLY needed to score.

Tonight was the perfect example. An early double minor penalty from Daniel Sedin resulted in 4 long minutes for the Bruins to make something happen. Did they? Nope. Then, after a penalty only Mike Tyson would be proud of, as well as another high stick to Chara's jugular, the B's earned an all-important 5 on 3 PP early in the second period. D'ya think they'd capitalize this time? Nah. 0-6 altogether on the man-advantage. More of the same. [sigh] On a bright note, they did manage to hold the unstoppable wrecking force that is the Canuck power play to 0-6 as well. However, Bruins fans shouldn't get used to it. If we really want to stop the Canucks from scoring those goals, we need to just not get 6 penalties a game. Because unlike the Bruins, Vancouver actually has their shit straight in that category. And it's only a matter of time until that 5-headed beast comes out.

What scares me is that this was really the first game of the playoff in which the Bruins didn't "eek" out a close win really late in the game. These are the games they have been winning. And these are the wins we need - especially on the road. Bruins need to wake up out of this blur by Saturday. If we go down 0-2, we might as well stop in Winnipeg on the way back and stay there until next season...

A Year in the Making

Well, I got my wish...so far.

The Black and Gold mustered up just enough determination and grit to squeak by the much-hated Canadian Dive Team in the first round in seven games - and I was there to witness it. I would say it was the happiest moment of my life so far...but in no way am I satisfied just yet.

As much as I'd like to dwell on the first round and rant about how amazing it was that we finally won a Game 7 for the first time in umpteen-something years, and how it came against a team that not only is the second-most hated team in Boston, but a team that in no way deserved to be on the same ice as the Bruins for the amateur and Sally-esque style of play that they possess...it's time to look forward- to the most hated team in Boston.

It only made sense that the Bruins would be matched up against the Flyers in the second round, right? I mean, I am convinced that there is someone up there scripting all of this. I imagine a round table in the clouds where the hockey gods (along with Steven King and maybe James Cameron) are sitting, brainstorming the best possible storyline for these playoffs...

And why not a story of revenge?

It'll go without saying what happened last year. Needless to say, May 14, 2010 was one of the worst days of my life...Now, a year removed, there is a chance for complete and utter redemption. So yeah, happiest day of my life? It hasn't happened yet. But there is potential...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVYlr848cVA&feature=related

Waiting for Nothing

Talk about being blue-balled.

I waited and waited and waited for this day to come. Since a week ago when the regular season ended. Since a month ago when the Bruins clinched. Since a year ago when....well, we won't go there tonight. I waited and waited and finally the day came. Game 1 of the 2011 NHL playoffs started tonight.

But even though the wait for this game felt like an eternity, the wait during the game felt even longer.

The Bruins spent 60 minutes piss-farting around the ice tonight and came up completely empty. Did Carey Price steal the show and win this game single-handedly for the Habs? Ehh Maybe, but I don't think so. Price did play well, but it was well enough. People are going to say that the Canadiens won tonight because of the stellar play of their young netminder and that the Bruins were doomed from the start. Falsetto McFalsenstein. If anything, Carey Price just prevented the Canadiens from losing tonight, but he really didn't need to do much. 31 saves, and most of them were in his chest. Many of the opportunities that the Bruins had to score (cough, Marchand) failed because the Bruins (cough, cough,) failed to finish the play - not because he made a spectacular save. I also think I counted 5 times when Chara shot the puck straight into the chestticles of Price.

I won't lie, the Bruins managed to keep the puck in the Montreal zone for much of the game. I'm sure the puck possession is something ridiculous - maybe even 2:1 Boston. The whole second period looked like it was a game of half-court pondhockey on Lake Montreal. Yet, the Bruins couldn't do anything but play grab-ass in the offense zone. Turnover after turnover. Missed shot after blocked shot after no-shot. Nothing. And let's be honest, the Canadiens were NOT playing offense and they were barely playing defense. Really, there was no excuse for a loss tonight, let alone zero goals...

If we learned anything from this game it's that Lucic may need to be benched. I don't know. I'm split on this decision. I'm usually against sitting one of your better players because of a slump. But I'm not sure Lucic is in a slump. I think he just might be getting lazy. I mean, if you're going to say that Carer Price single-handedly won the game for the Habs, you have to say that Lucic single-handedly lost the game for the B's. And I'm not just referring to the second goal (in which, he really did blow). He played like an donkey all night. Stiff hands, slow feet, poor stickhandling, marginal decision-making. Where's the 30 goal scorer we saw this year??? If we can't get him for the playoffs, can we at least get the balls-to-the-wall corner-crashing, slot-screening forechecker we saw before this year??? Julien sat Kessel in the '08 playoffs when he was playing like a donkey, so who knows...we may be seeing Seguin after all...

Looks like I'll have to wait a little longer to see some serious playoff hockey.

Location, Location, Location

Just a quick rant about college hockey before I put this season to bed for good...

Can somebody tell me who the HELL is in charge of organizing the Frozen Four?

Seriously.

I've never been more confused about a Division I college tournament bracket than I was about this year's Regional matchups. I just don't get it...

First of all, how does BC get an overall 3 seed, when they were just #2 in the nation last week and riding an 8 game winning streak that included a (1) a Hockey East regular season crown and a (2) Hockey East conference championship crown? Not only that but how did Yale earn the #1 overall seed??? Yale was ranked 3rd in the polls coming into the tourney, behind both BC and North Dakota and yet somehow managed to make a quantum leap over both schools. Am I missing something? Did Yale's ECAC crown really hold more weight over a Hockey East crown? I highly doubt that. I mean the only explanation is that they did it so that Yale could host a regional site, right?...

Ok so...

If that's the case that the committee fudged with the top seeds in order to match the top teams with the closest regional site, then can somebody - ANYBODY - tell me why BC had to play in St. Friggen Louis??? Especially when two of the four regional sites were in Manchester, NH and Bridgeport, CT!?

I understand that the regional sites are chosen way ahead of time and should have no bearing on which teams get chosen to play in each site, regardless of their proximity but....

Wait. I'm sorry? There IS a proximity consideration when selecting the teams for that region?

According to trusty Wikipedia (because the NCAA tends to be under wraps about this kind of stuff):

In setting up the tournament, the Championship Committee seeks to ensure "competitive equity, financial success and likelihood of playoff-type atmosphere at each regional site." A team serving as the host of a regional is placed within that regional. The top four teams are assigned overall seeds and placed within the bracket such that the national semifinals will feature the No. 1 seed versus the No. 4 seed and the No. 2 seed versus the No. 3 seed should the top four teams win their respective regional finals. Number 1 seeds are also placed as close to their home site as possible, with the No. 1 seed receiving first preference.

Oh really? So that's how it works? So, why - once again - did Boston College (a team from the Northeast) host a regional site located in the Midwest, while Miami of Ohio (a team from the midwest) was chosen to host a regional site located in the Northeast (Manchester, NH)?? Am I the only one who thought this was more than a little ass-backwards? Did the committee not have GoogleMaps up in front of them while they were making these seedings? Or was this an organized coup d'etat put in place to try to derail the defending champs?...

Conspiracy theories aside, my beloved Eagles lost - er, got crushed - in a game I'd rather not openly discuss about, and really there's no excuse for it. In the end, it's not so much about location as it is about coming in and playing your A game for 60 minutes - and BC just didn't do it. Which sucked, because they had been doing it all year long. Oh well...my hat's off to the boys. Championship or no championship, another fantastic and thrilling year of hockey on the Heights.

No but really, isn't it funny that the two #1 seeds playing away from home - BC and Miami (OH) - both lost in the first round? Just saying...

Tweeting the Blog Back to Life

I have officially done what I told myself I wouldn't do.

I've let too much time pass in between my last post and now. It's not that I haven't had anything to write about - it's actually the opposite. I've learned that the longer you hold off writing, the MORE you want to write about during that span of time. And then you just tweak yourself out deciding which topic to choose. And by the time you finally decide, it's too late, you're too tired, and you're distracted by the Speed Marathon on AMC. It happens.

[Fun Speed trivia: the guy who Keanu Reeves steals a car from to chase the bus down in the first Speed is the same guy Jason Patric steals a boat from to chase down Willem Dafoe's hydroplane in Speed 2: Cruise Control. Once again, something you'd probably only pick up on during a Speed marathon.]

So in the interest of feeling "caught up" and under the constraints of time and audience attention-span, I am going to attempt to briefly discuss everything that has been stirring around in my mindsauce over the past few weeks - in 140 characters or less....

NFL Lockout

Thx to sporcle I learned that ALL 32 NFL teams rank in the Top 50 Most Valuable Sports franchises IN THE WORLD.Tot=$33BIL...I mean, C'mon!

NFL Rule Changes (Kickoffs, Replays)

So you're changing the rules for a game that probably won't be played next year? Don't you guys have something better to do? (See above)

Bruins

Chara decapitates Pacioretty. Montreal police set bounty. Recchi calls out Pacioretty's toughness. B's kill Habs 7-0. Moral: Canada sucks.

Red Sox

Pedroia buys a hot dog during a spring training game and goes completely unrecognized...So we have that in common.

Celtics:

Watching the C's during the reg season is like watching Nenad Krstic's hair grow. When do the playoffs start?...

March Madness

Nominations for 1st born son: Jimmer, J'Covan, JaJuan,, E'Twaun, Shabazz...I should make a bracket. There's also these: click.

St. Patty's Day Parade

Nothing says SPD like bagpipes, green beer, 10' unicyclists, Justin Bieber working the sausage stand and pictures of people taking pictures.

The Adjustment Bureau

It's official. Emily Blunt is the ONE.

Charlie Sheen

Mr. Sheen beat out the Tokyo Earthquake for the most searched keyword on Google last week. Another sign of the apocalypse (no pun intended)

Apple Released the iPad 2

Now with stronger cloth lining for those extra tough times of the month!

Phew. I feel much more caught up now....

[Stay tuned for the much-awaited "Glee" post.]

Sexiled

Everyone has that one night in their lives that they'll regret forever. Right?

Maybe you had a few too many slippery nipple shots at the bar the night before and woke up in a blurry haze the next morning lying butt-naked in a public garden next to Lolita, the 4'5" Spanish midget from the local Foxy Lady. It happens to everybody. We make mistakes. We're only human.

But for Brandon Davies, being human may have just cost him his basketball scholarship.

On Tuesday, it was announced that Davies, the BYU sophomore forward out of Provo, UT, had been dismissed from the team indefinitely for his conduct off the court. At first, all the university would not go any specific details about the transgressions that led to the dismissal. Then on Wednesday, word finally got out that the sophomore had been released from the team and suspended from the school for breaking an "honor code" upheld at the institution. When I first heard this, my initial thought was that Colonel Jessup was in the building. Honor code? Did he give away Coca Cola's secret recipe or something?

As it turned out, Davies was dismissed from the team as a consequence to one of those nights he'll always regret. But in this case, there was no alcohol or public indecency or Spanish midgets. Brandon Davies was suspended and kicked off the basketball team for having sex...with his girlfriend.

Now I know BYU is supposed to be all uber-religious and strict and straight-edge when it comes to all this stuff but...really? The man has intercourse with his girlfriend and that's enough behavior to warrant a permanent dismissal from the team and possible dismissal from the school? The dude wasn't drinking, wasn't smoking, and really wasn't doing anything illegal. And yet, he gets one of the stiffest punishments I have seen given to a college athlete in a long, long time. It just doesn't make sense.

Yeah yeah, BYU is full of Mormons and Mormons don't believe in drugs, alcohol or premarital sex. But let's be honest here, this kid was probably going to marry this girl next week anyway. More than half of the kids walking around that school are married already and many of them have children too. And wait another year, I bet some of them will be married again. And again. I just don't get it.

Without trying to go into the logistics of the actual religion and its actual rules and beliefs, I'm just going to say that I think the thing that gets to me the most is the inconsistency this action

sets against the rest of the league. I mean, think about it. In the past year alone, how many times have we seen college athletes getting suspended just a couple games for recruiting violations and taking gifts from boosters and getting into barfights, etc? You'd be stupid to think that all college athletes are alcohol and drug-free. And you'd be really stupid to think that college athletes don't have premarital sex. Much of the time, their "destructive" behavior goes under the radar. And when they do get caught, it's usually only a brief suspension. Is it fair that BYU is 100 times stricter? No. But is it the risk you take when you choose to go to a college like that. I guess so.

And let's get to the real issue at hand. Because it's not like this happened to any little division III program in Chaunceyville USA. BYU was ranked #3 in the nation and coming off a huge victory over conference rival and #6 ranked San Diego State when this happened. They were almost a shoe-in for a #1 seed in the NCAA tourney in a few weeks. Now, they have to play without their 3rd leading scorer and best option inside the paint. Now all opposing teams have to do is focus on defending wonderboy Jimmer Fredette and they'll have a chance to win.

Exhibit A: tonight's game. New Mexico 82, BYU 64. (in Provo)

The only "honor code" being broken here is BYU giving away their own secret recipe.

A Trade With No Perks...

[Sorry to those who, for some reason, might've be expecting a post about Glee tonight...]

Say it Ainge so.

While most of the world was at work today, Celtics President Danny Ainge was working to...dismember the team? Wait a second. Let me try to get this straight. We ship out big man Kendrick Perkins and spark plug Nate Robinson - two proven playoff players - in exchange for a guy who has already proven not to work out for us, in Jeff Green, and a guy who's name looks like the letters I just picked up in scrabble, in Nenad Krstic. [For the record, if you haven't downloaded "Words with Friends" yet - basically a Scrabble knock-off - do it. Probably one of the most addicting games out there right now. Thank God I didn't discover this game in college.]

And as if losing Perk and Donkey wasn't enough, Danny boy ships out Semih Erden (another Scrabble player) and the Irish Cavemonster, Luke Harangody to the Cavs for...a second round pick?!?! Como say what? I mean, I've heard of making cap room, but this is straight up early spring cleaning. Why are we clearing out space for a team that can't even show up to practice without wheelchairs and crutches?

Now I'm usually a guy who tends to take the optimist side of mid-season trade involving my favorite team. I can usually understand the logistics and necessities that go into making moves through front offices and management and what-have-you. I try to look at the deal through the

GM's eyes. Heck, they must know more than I do, right? I mean, at first it was a shock, but after a while I could begin to understand why Belichick sent Randy Moss packing in exchange for a third round pick. Even the Manny Ramirez trade 3 years ago wasn't necessarily a blind-side hit. Yes, I weeped like a little girl when it happened, but it's not like I didn't see it coming.

There's only one real trade that's occurred from a Boston sports team that I never really understood or accepted. And that day was Dec. 1, 2005 when Bruins GM Mike O'Connell shipped out beloved captain Joe Thornton to the San Jose Sharks for Marco Sturm, Brad Stuart and Wayne Primeau. Stupid. Stupid

stupid.

While this trade had at least some meaning in it - Jeff Green can spread out the floor and Krstic is, well, big enough - I just don't see how this trade makes the team any better. If anything, this trade was perfect for the Thunder, who needed a big presence inside like Perk. Yes, Perk has been injury-prone, but when he's healthy he's dominant. And nasty Nate is nasty Nate. You know, a guy who'll jump on your back during the playoffs. Literally.

Anyway, as I predicted, the Celtics-Nuggets game tonight was atrocious. Talk about a matchup between two teams who just look plain empty. The injury-laden Celtics barely had enough players to put out on the court (after the Big 4 - and even they didn't play a lot of minutes) and the new Melo-less Nuggets looked just as hollow. It was like watching pong. The two sides were just...there. It looked like neither team wanted to be there, and I'm pretty sure the Celtics just stopped playing after 3 quarters. 89-75 loss. Woo. Can't wait for the playoffs. Woo...

[Post-note: just found out Perkins was "very upset and emotional" about being traded. 8 years. Gone. Thanks Ainge. You meany.]

Beans, Beans, They're Good for Your Heart...

...especially on Valentine's Day.

I know it's been a little more than a full 24 hours removed since the big victory Monday night but I couldn't let another minute pass without expressing how fortunate I am to witness and be apart of a true dynasty (dare I say) in Division I college hockey. Boston College Hockey: three Beanpot Championships in four years, three Hockey East Championships in four years, and two National Championships in three years...and there's no sign of slowing down this season. Captain Whit and the boys are ranked #1 in the national standings this week and get a rematch of the recent Beanpot foe NU this coming Friday at home. Things are looking good. Again. I hate to say anything because of the fear of jinxing us, but I've never felt this confident in team to the point where I expect them to win every game since...well, a certain professional football squad in 2007. Our guys are doing some amazing things out there on the ice and that's all I really have to say.

Along the lines of the game itself, well, it wasn't the cleanest game of hockey I've seen, no. But as I said, I never lost the confidence that we would pull it off in the end. Even after the NU goal with a little over a minute left in regulation. This game had 2008 beanpot final vs. Harvard written all over it - a back-and-forth goal-laden affair with a few (un)fortunate bounces and a handful of defensive breakdowns. Throw in a few minutes of overtime and boom, 2008 beanpot deja vu - minus Nick Petrecki canoeing through center ice...

All in all, I couldn't be more proud of these guys. And at the same time, I couldn't be more proud of the BC fanbase. I don't know if it was just because this was my first time sitting 'outside' the student section portion of the bleachers but the fans looked great. A full four sections were filled, and there were plenty more overflowing just outside the main corner. It seemed like three or four years ago, there was half that number (something that still boggles my mind - who's not going to the Beanpot?). And yeah, people are going to make the argument that the place was louder when Northeastern scored then when BC did. You'd probably be right - but you have to take into consideration a couple things. A.) Any BU fans that were still there (you know who you are) were guaranteed rooting against BC (and not necessarily for NU). B.) Anyone else was either doing the same as BU fans or just rooting for NU because people who have no loyalty tend to side with the underdog - in this case, a team that hasn't won the tournament in 23 years. Can't really blame 'em, but then again, don't really feel bad for them either. As a colleague of mine likes to say, "haters gonna hate."

[Side note: I wanted to make a remark about lowly BU losing to an even lowlier Harvard in the consolation game, but to tell you the truth, I think that loss is embarrassing and humiliating enough for them. 4th place out of 4? Well, at least you can't get any worst next year, BU...]

Congratulations again to the boys for another absolutely amazing tournament victory. Two years in a row drinking out of that thing and that, my friends, is one thing that'll never get old...

Rockin' The Suburbs, Just Like Arcade Fire Did...

Finally.

I had to sit through three and a half painful hours but I finally got to see what I wanted to see: Good. Music. Rewarded.

The Academy got it right (for once) Sunday night and chose Arcade Fire's most recent album, "The Suburbs," as Album of the Year. To be honest, this was just an enormous bonus for me in general. I was just excited to watch their Grammy-debut performance,

the main reason why I had to push

myself through 3.5 hours of redundant Top 40 pop crap. The actual award (which followed the performance) was just the frosting to the anxious cake I had been baking throughout the show. And boy did it taste good in the end.

Actually, after saying that, I suppose the Grammy Award should be the cake itself and the figurative frosting would be AF's performance of "Ready to Start" that closed out the ceremonies. Because I'm not going to lie, although I do love the song "Month of May", I was a little disappointed with the performance. Were they trying to bring back BMXing? Were they trying to give me a light-induced seizure? Did they only pick that song because the lyrics suggest the process of "making an album"?.... Ehhhhh, in that case, I see what you did there, Arcade Fire...touche. Would've liked to see "We Used to Wait" but hey, we can't have our cake and eat it too...I swear that's my last cake reference.

[Which, speaking of, can we discuss real quickly how every person under the reign of God had a birthday this weekend? I'm serious, according to my trusty Facebook statistics, I was "friends" with 11 people who had a birthday on 2/13 and 8 people who had a birthday on 2/12. That just seems absurd to me. I can't even name 19 of my friends' birthdays, but chances are it was this weekend. Parents: stop getting frisky in the Month of May. Anyone see what I did there? Anyone? Bueller?]

Although I was surprised by AF's 'underdog', I can't cay that I didn't see it coming. As Grammy history would tend to suggest, the band that plays live on stage who also happens to be nominated for an award that is presented directly after their performance...usually wins. It happened tonight with Lady Antebellum - but then again, they seemed to clean house tonight anyway. [Funny, I don't know how I feel about a song that sounds like it belongs on EVERY episode of Glee winning that many Grammys but oh well...Better than Glee winning a Grammy. Wait, did they?] The funnier thing is that this didn't happen with Justine Bieby Bieby Beiby Oh! Thank god.

So, in any event, I guess I called it for AF. But then again, I did fall off my chair when they actually won. I mean, beating out the Super Overrated PopTards of Lady Gaga-bellum, Katy Perry, and Eminem (who isn't pop, but is a bit overrated) was a true underdog story. And the greatest part was that they were just as surprised as anyone as they scrambled to take the stage again (Win Butler blurting out "What the hell?") - just perfect. [And almost too perfect. Like, they must've planned it that way right? If Gaga would've won, would she have gone up there and got in her egg while the credits rolled? It only made sense that they put AF at the end of the show like that. I see what you did, Grammy Producers...]

10 Things We Learned about the Grammys:

1. Christina Aguilera is having the worst week of her life. First she forgets the words to the

National Anthem on the nation's biggest stage, then she forgets how to walk on LA's biggest stage. Hey Christina,maybe it's time to sit a few plays out. Maybe go back into hiding for a few

more months....

2. Lady Gaga proved that she is the devil. Who came from an egg. So, I guess, that makes her a deviled egg?

3. Wait, so...Lance Bass is Lady Antebellum? I mean, I knew he was a lady and all. But who knew he teamed up with Miley Cyrus and Demetri Martin to make this supergroup. I need to start listening to these guys. Gals. Whatever.

4. Hey, Johnny Mayer. Johnny Depp called. He wants his look back....

5. Hey Katy Perry. Zooey Deschanel called. She still wants her look back.

6. Hey Cee-Lo Green, the NBC Peacock called...yeah, you get the point....

7. Did anyone else think it was ironic that they had Mick Jagger perform right after they did a montage of musicians that have died in the past year? And did I catch Bob Dylan's name come up on that list?...

8. Hey Eminem, why so serious? Seriously. When he performs, he just yells. When they show

him on camera, he just glares. When he wins a Grammy, he just doesn't care.

Hey Em, how bout you smile for once. I mean, I know your mom sucked and your wife beat you and you grew up in Detroit and whatever, but life's not all that hard for now right? Don't you have money and friends and fame and all that good stuff? Why do you always have to play the "everyone's out to get me card"? I'm white, your white, let's go to Starbucks and talk about this.

9. Saw the commercial for Little Red Riding Hood. Since when did childhood fairy tales turn into

dark, gothic psychological thrillers? I blame Sherlock Holmes...

10. ...and finally! Happy Valentine's Day from Usher + Justin Beiber. The cutest couple on the planet! That love confession tonight was one of the most homo-romantic moments on stage since Diana Ross went to second base on Lil' Kim at the VMAs.

Album of the Week: This should be obvious. Clearly, it's "The Suburbs" by Arcade Fire. If you haven't had a chance to listen to this phenomenal record, get your hands on it today.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqyakRmPNM8

This Is Why We Fight

So I've really been meaning to share my thoughts about the Super Bowl and the Beanpot and...Glee(?) - yeah, believe it or not, I have some things to say about that god-awful excuse for a show, but we'll hold off for now. The truth is, tonight was such a great night in sports that I felt it necessary to start there.

So let's start here...

That was by far the BEST Bruins game of the year tonight. I mean, talk about getting your money's worth if you were at the garden earlier. You got the hated Canadiens coming in to town - the B's being winless against the Habs this year - and the two teams stand between two points of each other at the top of the Northeast divisional standings. The match-up had drama written all over it from the start, and boy did it not disappoint. 14 total goals (including 8 in the 2nd period alone), 187 combined penalty minutes...and oh yeah, a goalie fight! Now although, it didn't quite seem like Thomas and Price were in it for blood, it's still always exciting when you get to see two goalies get together and drop the gloves. It's so rare these days, it's almost like seeing a safety happen in football. You know, once a team (granted not yours) gets pinned to their own 1 yard line, you feel yourself start to root for the fateful sack in the endzone, because let's be honest how weird does 2 points look on the scoreboard!?...But I digress...Such to say, no one does it quite like Patrick Roy used to do it. And so for that, I give you this:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeF5XF8jxkQ and then this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kl2xMXXOw4M. But in all seriousness, what a fantastic game tonight. And for the B's to get the W in a sloppy game like that is twice as huge.

And speaking of fighting and coming up huge, I have to quickly defend someone right now who doesn't get a lot of credit. And that person is Mr. Andrew Ference. A lot of people wrote this guy off early in the year this year because of history of injuries and occasional lackadaisical defensive play, but I'll tell you what, I'd take this guy as my teammate any day. I mean, did anyone see him go after Travis Moen tonight, a guy who is a solid 5 inches taller than him and probably about 20-30 pounds heavier? And he stuck in there pretty well. Earlier in the year, Ference went after (bigger guy) David Backes of the STL Blues for laying out elderman Mark Recchi, and then not too long ago Ference beat the absolute living daylight out of Adam Burish of the Stars during that heavymatch on Feb. 3rd - a fight that left Burish with several broken bones in his face [see video below]. Also recently, Ference took a lot of flak from two fellow former-Bruins alum, Don Cherry and Mike Millbury, for allegedly breaking an "unwritten rule" about not talking to the press about a teammate's physical play, referring to Paille's suspension-worthy check on Raymond Sawada. While I agree on the matter at hand, I really didn't see anything in this interview that suggested that Ference was "speaking out against" his teammate. In fact, in my mind, he was only trying to sympathize with Paille and relate to him in that situation, elaborating upon the difficulty of playing physical as a backchecking forward. Ference, you're ok in my book. Campbell, I'm still warming up to you...

Texas A&M - My New Haircut

So about two weeks ago, I bet my buddy Derek that I wouldn't cut my hair until I got a streak of 10 on ESPN's Streak for the Cash. I've only reached the 10 mark twice since the contest has been running (about 2 years now) so I figured it was quite the feat, but hey, I needed to get my Justin Bieber on for Friday's premiere of "Never Say Never" [Can I just say that I literally spit out my soda when I saw the trailer for this...I just, I just have no words for it. Sickening, maybe. C'mon America. Making a documentary of Justin Bieber is probably the lowest low this country has seen since the economy. Wait, isn't he Canadian?...] In any event, I somehow managed to rack up a streak of five over the weekend, and then methodologically mapped out my steps starting this week. I won't say all of my picks here, but just know that I called the BC BBall prop bet last night (BC 3-pointers vs. Clemson Win Margin). I knew it'd prob be a close loss for BC (as we've been accustomed to), yet I also knew for a fact that BC would take their usual 30-35 three-point attempts, making about 9 or 10 of them. And wouldn't you know... 9 three's, 8-point loss. Today, I was given a gift with a G'town vs. Syracuse prop (G'town 3's vs. 'Cuse Win Margin), taking the obvious Hoya side (I probably would've even picked them straight up - not because I like G'town, 'Cuse is just playing pretty bad these days). And then, I "accidentally" picked Texas A&M straight up against Colorado on the road. It's not a bad pick, looking at the records and RPI. But I REALLY wanted to take Duke: Single-Digit Win or Loss vs. UNC, who has been playing lights-out lately. But nope, I forgot to change it before the deadline passed as I was stuck with the Aggies. Thank the Lord for ESPN3.com so I could watch probably one of the most miserably agonizing games I've seen in a while. It was like someone told the Aggies I'd have to Bieber for the rest of my life if they blew the game. At one point, A&M turned a 1-point lead into a 6-point deficit - ALL IN ONE PLAY - because Freshman Roberson dropped an elbow to a players chest after the whistle. The player was granted 4 FT's and the Buffaloes got the ball back, in which they promptly nailed a three-pointer. I almost shut the computer off and put the clippers away. And then, as if the Basketball gods descended upon that arena in suburban Colorado, BJ Holmes did his best Acie Law IV impression and sunk a Jimmer Fredette-range treyball with 1 second on the clock to tie the game. I've never cheered so hard for A&M...well maybe since the Acie Law IV days. Aggies took care of business in OT and I'll take care of Bieber tomorrow. No really, that girly little muffinmuncher is going down...Enough is enough.

Other great games tonight:

- Rutgers beat #10 ranked Villanova 77-76 after being down by a baker's dozen late in the game and hitting a quasi-buzzer-beating threeball, a la Texas A&M. Instead of rushing the court, Rutgers fans rushed to the nearest White Castle and then rolled around in the landfill that is NJ for an hour as a celebration.

- BYU Jimmer Fredette's beat Air Force 90-52. No surprise there, the kid drops bombs. You see what I did there? Bombs. Because it's the Air F....no? Ok, we'll let that one slide.

- Cleveland Cavaliers lost their 26th game in a row. Apparently playing with 5 cardboard cutouts of LeBron James doesn't quite match 1 real LeBron James. Time for Plan B. Actually, 26 losses? It's really like Plan Z then. Hurry up and win Cleveland, you're running out of letters...

That's all. I'm sick. And tired. But not necessarily sick and tired.

Album of the week - The Decemberists "The King is Dead"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoa5AL6VFk0

Weekend Recap: Hey Now, You're an All-Star

Things we learned this weekend:

1. All-star games can be fun!

Just take a look at the NHL. The league switched it up this year and instead of doing the usual "East vs. West" match-up, they decided to have a fantasy-type, school-yard-esque draft. I won't lie, I wasn't a big fan of the idea when they announced it. I thought it was just a silly idea to try to spark interest in a game that really doesn't matter. And then I realized that that's exactly what they were trying to do, and well...can you blame them? Gary Bettman, historically, hasn't ever really been the greatest model of marketing in the business and the league annually tries to keep it's proverbial head above water in the this nation's ocean of relevancy. I myself will watch professional hockey until the day I die, so no worries there. And no one really needs to worry about Canada losing interest in the sport any time soon. But as for the general American public, hockey comes in a distant fourth to Football, Baseball and Basketball (and in actuality, it's a

distant fifth if you consider NASCAR, which I heard somewhere along the line is first in terms of ratings? Sad, but true.) Well, after all is said and done, I think the NHL's

move this year was quite the success. It was no jackpot in my opinion, but it definitely made it more interesting to watch (Especially knowing that two players on the same team regularly - such as Zdeno Chara and Tim Thomas - would be playing against each other...or finally splitting up the Sedin twins, for that matter.) Not only that, but the skills competition on Saturday night was pretty entertaining too. I think it was really the first time I watched all (ok, most) of the skills comp, and I did enjoy it. Overall, I give the NHL a B+ this year for the All-Star game.

[Side note: Has anyone checked Jeff Skinner's (see photo) birth certificate? Like this kid has to be no older than 12 years old, right? Every time they cut to him this weekend, I thought someone had switched the station to Nickelodeon. Like honestly, this kid makes Danny Woodhead look like Bob Barker.]

2. All-Star games can be not fun...(still)

The NFL should just get rid of the ProBowl. I really can't see it getting any better. And it's pretty bad. It's actually amazing how many people I've heard completely shit on the ProBowl (for lack of a better phrase) - and it's just about everyone I've talked to. People don't like it, and I think the NFL knows that. The league spends very little to no money promoting the actual game, knowing that people won't watch it anyway, so why bother? Now that I think about it, I don't think they should get rid of it. Every sport needs an all-star break or game of some sort. But football is just so awkward. The season is too short to have it in the middle of season and players would never play with the fear of getting hurt mid-season anyway - chances are a lot of the players would rather have a second bye-week to rest than have to play an extra week. So what do you do? The league has already moved the game to the week before the Super Bowl, rather

than having it the week after. Good move, other than the fact that you'll never

see a Super Bowl contending player in that game now.

The NFL has tried to move the game to mainland USA (in 2010), rather than the Hawai'i site they've used since 1980. Bad move, keep

it in Hawai'i. It gives the players a little vacation/reason to actually go to the ProBowl, and it keeps the god-awful game as far away as possible from here. It is kind of cool seeing all my fantasy football stars in one place at one time, but really, there's just something about Brandon Merriweather and Darelle Revis joking around together in the same secondary that just bugs me...Oh yeah, and seeing Bill Belichick wearing a lei and a visor makes me want to throw up in my mouth. Talk about everything I thought I knew about the man crashing down in front of my eyes (although, he did look very uncomfortable in the attire). Overall NFL all-star grade: C-, per usual.

3. Antonio Cromartie needs to go away.

Sorry, JP, I have to rip the Jets just once more...Antonio Cromartie, go away. Stop whining and crying and threatening everyone in the league. Yeah, we get it, you don't want a lockout. No one does. You want to play next year, I get that. I want to see you (well, not you, per se) play. But how about getting stuff done productively instead of looking to pick a fight with everyone? For those who don't know, I'm referring to this article posted on ESPN.com later last week, where Cromartie threatened to "smash Matt Hasselbeck's face in" after Hasselbeck tweeted about Cromartie's recent comments. Really, Cromartie? You're going to smash his face in? Real professional. This was just like the time you called Tom Brady an "a--hole" after Wes Welker made quirky innuendos about Rex Ryan's foot fetish. It's funny how much trash talking you do through the fact that you can't take the trash talk yourself. And it's not even trash talk, it's just a little joke that most people would laugh off, accept or ignore. But no, Cromartie, you took the violent/threatening road. Someone says something you don't like and you get all defensive like a whiny little kid. Which is ironic, because you have 7 of them with 6 different women. Go away.

4. Never leave me and Biggz alone in your apartment while you go to the store...not even for 5 minutes.

So while Sasha was out running a few errands on Newbury, we decided to play "Easter-TP Hunt" in his bathroom. Can you count the number of rolls hidden in the picture below?

5. There's a difference between a "number 3" on hair clippers and a "number 3" on facial hair clippers.

Biggz found out the hard way.

[Side note: after this happened, I immediately thought of that scene in "My Best Friend's Girl" when Jason Biggs' character accidentally shaves his eyebrow off. It basically played out the same way as the movie, with the same reaction and everything - but the strangest thing is the fact that this happened to Biggz. Biggs, Biggz...I couldn't make this stuff up. Absolutely perfect.]

[Side note to the side note: I actually enjoyed "My Best Friend's Girl". Going into it, it had all the makings to be a horrible flop - it was a cliche romantic comedy featuring the quintessential RomCom superstar Kate Hudson and the sell-out stand-up-comic-turned-annoyingly-likable-romcom-protagonist Dane Cook. Although, I don't blame Mr. Cook for "Employee of the Month." Jessica Simpson's horrendous acting ruined everything about that movie. But I'd have to say, MBFG was one of the better RomComs I've seen in a while. The way it opens with Dane Cook recklessly "tanking" the date is genius and the wedding scene later on is pretty good too. But in all seriousness, my favorite part about that movie by FAR is the comedic acting ability of Alec Baldwin. He nailed the part of Dane Cook's chauvinistic and relentlessly obscene father and the scene when he's in his office with Dane and his secretary (also, continued here) is purely phenomenal. It really makes me want to get more into 30Rock.]

Good weekend. Overall: B. Which is the combined grade of me and Biggz' attractiveness level, apparently.

Is Alexandr Dolgopolov and That Ugly Chick from 50 First Dates the Same Person?

Happy Australia Day everybody.

(Props to Sabertooth for calling this...)

Sydney Oprah House?

Sooooo as I watch this whole 'Orpah does Australia' series (and yes, I am slighly ashamed to say that it is 1:49am on a Friday night and I'm watching Oprah), it has given me some serious mixed feelings. And I'd like to explain why...

A.) As a person who has recently traveled and studied in Australia, this whole series has given me some serious nostalgia. All it takes is for them to show an aerial view of the Sydney harbour as they're cutting to commercial and I immediately feel like I need to be back there...Now. Every time Oprah raves about how great of an experience she had there, I think about how great of an experience I had there. (Maybe I didn't have quite the SAME experience she did, but you know what I mean...) And she's right, God do I miss that place. It really is one of the most beautiful countries in the world and more people should get out there at least once in their life. Now that that's said...

B.) Does anyone else feel like Oprah is almost making a mockery of the great land down unda'? I know it's almost heresy to say anything negative about the Almighty "O", but I just got this really awkwardly 'fake' feeling while watching this (and let me reiterate, I wouldn't be watching this if she wasn't in a country where I pretty much spent 5+ best months of my life in). But really, the whole time I was watching this I got the feeling like she felt SHE discovered the country and needed to tell the world about her discovery, as if no one knew Australia was a real country already. With REAL people. Honestly, the whole time they made it seem like Oprah was a 'normal' human who had landed in a world of 'unnormal aliens'. Take, for instance, her guests. In a span of 4 shows, she interviewed stars such as Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe, Nicole Kidman, Keith Urban and Olivia Newton-John (all Aussies)..and for some reason Bono(has anyone told the Big O that Bono is Irish yet? No? We're gonna let that one slide? Ok...). Ok, makes sense - you're in Australia, interview Australians - I get that. But is was what she asked the interviewees that boggled my mind. Her interviews only lasted about 4 or 5 minutes each and would consist of vague and cliche questions such as "So what's the difference between Australians and Americans?" or "Do you know other Australian actors?" or "What's it like being an Australian?" Really? Have you ever asked a twin what it's like being a twin? The usual response is most likely "what's it like NOT being a twin?" I seriously felt awkward listening to someone like Nicole Kidman have to answer that question while she simultaneously thought The difference between us and Americans is we don't ask stupid questions like that. And to make things ever more awkwarder, they had to answer these questions in front of 6,000+ fellow Aussies who have jampacked themselves onto the steps on the Sydney Opera House - which should now be referred to as the Syndey Oprah House. If I were an Aussie in that crowd, I'd be asking myself, who does this woman think she is?...and then I'd quickly think...oh yeah, this is the woman who is about to give me a $6,000 diamond necklace for free. Which brings me to my next point.

C.) Are all of these 'surprise' Oprah giveaways really a good thing for society? That sounds like a college essay topic so let me clarify...Everyone always raves about how charitable Oprah is and how she always gives her audience members cars and trips and diamonds and blah blah blah. Yeah, that's all cool but after a while the element of surprise is thrown out the window. I mean Pavlov must be rolling in his grave. If I go on that show, you best believe I'm going home with a 2011 Volkswagon Buggy or a brand new HP laptop (irony to be discussed later). Imagine going on that show and NOT getting something? Heads. would. roll. That's all I'm saying. You put me on that show, from the moment I walk into the studio and sit in that seat I won't be able to focus on anything else going on with the actual production of the show. Little Jimmy's cancer is in remission and he was reunited with his long-lost father? Who cares, where's my car? It's sad to say, but I mean c'mon, you KNOW people in the audience are expecting these things. Which is why I'm so surprised when I see them surprised. Diamond necklace? Yeah, I saw that coming, let's go honey... (although the way she revealed the aussie trip was a gem)

D.) So this whole Australia trip was just a big marketing scheme right? I mean, if anyone's gonna appreciate a spontaneous voyage to Australia, it's this guy. But to make that trip into a 4-episode long commercial for Australia Tourism - that's almost worse than Queen LeBron's "Decision" (but not really, I still hate LeBron much much more). Not to mention the countless promotions for Qantas, Telstra, hp, etc. Ok ok, I get the sponsor part. I'm in the advertising business. But at points I just felt like the promotions and sponsors were just taking away from the whole thing. (Which reminds me, Oprah is "friends" with a lot of big companies huh? Every time she goes to give something away it's always "And our friends over at [company] have been kind enough to donate [millions of products]..." Actually, that company gave stuff away to boost it's branding, not necessarily to be nice, but good on ya....)(Btw, when did I get this narcisistic? Damn you Oprah.)

E.) Did anyone catch episode 3 when Oprah cured that guys cancer with $25,000? Funny, the cure for AIDS is $180,000...

F.) Fact: Oprah tried to kill Hugh Jackman.

G.) The way Oprah took over Australia is almost sickening. It's almost like she landed in the country, marked her territory, called herself the Queen and ordered millions of habitants to follow her to the steps of the Oprah House to drink the koolaid. And when I say marked her territory, I mean literally...

When all is said and done, I guess Oprah really is the Queen of everything. And there's really no fighting that. She'll be the most beloved person in the world until the day she dies. And then maybe after that too.

Where's my car?

Exile: Stage Left

"Even the losers get lucky sometimes."
-Tom Petty

I want to say something cliche about how "change is inevitable" but I'll let things speak for itself. Like this blog for instance. I had only posted once before I decided it's time for a change. Don't ask me why. I wasn't 100% in love with the title - I mean, don't get me wrong, the last title (...On life, sports, and the Pursuit of the ONE) described basically about what I'd be writing about, but I didn't think it 'flowed' as a title. And the template was kind of weak. So here's try #2 at a title...

"A Fraudulent Zodiac"

Here's my explanation: The actual phrase comes from one of my favorite Third Eye Blind songs, 'God of Wine' ("Every glamorous sunrise throws the planets out of line/a star sign out of whack/a fraudulent zodiac"). Second, I found the title to be appropriate at this time considering all the uproar that these so-called 'astologists' are creating by telling people that their zodiac signs are changing because of a shift in the earth's axis (or something?). Classic. I heard some people are getting all riled up because now they think that their whole spiritual life as been a complete lie. It's amazing what people actually believe in these days. It's just a cluster of stars, is it not? But then again, I can't really hate - people have to believe in something...even if it changes. Even if the change is for the worse.

Which brings me to the New England Patriots. In all honesty, I've been holding off posting for so long basically because I've been in a solitary depression for the past 4 days. I actually cannot believe what I saw on Sunday. Going into the game, I had no worries in my mind. None. Not after drudging the lowly New Jersey Jets 45-3 in week 13. Not after seeing the complete dominance the offense displayed on the so-called 'stellar' jet defense. Not after the utter embarrassment Rex Ryan put on himself after that game - a game in which he trash talked his way INTO the game, only to stick his foot in his mouth afterwards - yes, pun very much intended. And of course, not after watching and listening for a whole week to the same nonsensical rabble and banter from the same coach and players who should've learned their lesson about trash talking just 4 or 5 weeks back...This whole game had Pats dominance written all over. Why? The Patriots don't lose to inferior teams like this - especially ones that have gotten just plain lucky throughout the season (see: Texans, Lions, etc.) and then run their mouth like they're better than they are. They just don't and they never have. Until now...The Patriots have changed. Last year they let a Baltimore team that they should've easily handled slip by in the first round and now this. The Patriots, sad to say, have lost their playoff mojo. They haven't won a playoff game since the game before they lost the super bowl to the New Jersey Little Giants (another team they should've easily handled). Did that super bowl jinx the pats? Who knows. Maybe the zodiac believers believe that. But whatever it is, the pats have changed. And for the worst.

I really can't talk about it anymore without wanting to throw up in my mouth but I do just want to say that I sincerely want to punch Rex Ryan in that giant globular face. The man deserves shit and he knows it. All he does is run his mouth and hope for the best. Watching his press conferences make me wonder if he ACTUALLY knows how the game of football works. All he ever talks about is "this is personal between me and Peyton, Belichick, my wife's feet, etc." or "[player] is really good, but [player] is better, but not as good as [player]" or "our defense is good". None of his responses have any actual substance in them and everything he does it seems like he is doing it for attention from the media. Seriously, does anyone actually think this guy is a real coach? Like there must be a mini-Belichick clone that comes out of a crawlspace somewhere before practice and games and really coaches the team. Or maybe Rex Ryan's brother is controlling his coaching moves during the game from inside his body - like "The 6th Man" ft. Marlon Wayans.



Needless to say, once the game ended, all I wanted to do was go hide in a hole somewhere. So I did the next best thing: take a 5 hour drive to the middle of the nowhere in the backwoods of the Catskill Mountains. And that's where I have been for the past 4 days. Away from anything and everything that might remind me of the american sport of football. This is my exile. (Go Bruins)

Pilot

"Just remember, the same as a spectacular Vogue magazine, remember that no matter how close you follow the jumps: Continued on page whatever. No matter how careful you are, there's going to be the sense you missed something, the collapsed feeling under your skin that you didn't experience it all. There's that fallen heart feeling that you rushed right through the moments where you should've been paying attention. Well, get used to that feeling. That's how your whole life will feel some day. This is all practice. None of this matters. We're just warming up."
--Chuck Palahniuk

...And so it goes... I'm not going to lie here. I wanted to open my brand spankin' new blog with a bang - something inspirational and maybe even eye-opening at the same time. Something other than "hey, here's my new blog. enjoy." In school, I always had the natural tendency to begin an essay with a quote. You know, something that sparks interest and is relevant at the same time. Well, naturally, for this blog, I thought 'why not, I'll look up a quote'. However, the process of finding a quote literally entailed me typing the word "quote" into Bing (specific, I know). As I typed, the search result "quotes about life" auto-guessed for me. Of course I clicked on it and the first result that came up was thinkexist.com. Going with the flow, I clicked this top result. The page loaded and BAM: inspiration. This quote was the very FIRST quote in the quote of quotes. I almost skipped over it, but once I read it I thought, yeah that's just about exactly what I want to start my blog with. It's dramatic, it's inspirational, it's depressing, it's mind-explodingly complex...It's just like the movie Fight Club (which makes sense to me now that I realize who Chuck Palahniuk is...I always get him mixed up with Chuck Klosterman). But I digress...

Here's my new blog. Enjoy.

I won't say much in this first entry. I feel like I just needed to get it out there, let it soak on the interwebs for a while and then come back and start posting like a...postman? You know what they say, the first one is always the hardest. Or is it the first cut is the deepest? Either way, the waiting is the hardest part. And most likely, the hardest button to button.

So here it is, Blog #1...On Life, Sports and the Pursuit of the ONE. (Title still TBD)

[Thoughts on the title...as some of my "readers" will know (I use readers in quotes because, you know, who knows who is actually reading this), I originally planned to make a blog completely dedicated to the concept of the ONE (If you're not familiar to this concept, you clearly haven't hung around me long enough on any given weekend night). While I still plan to dwell on this concept in many an entry, I would also like to talk about other things that spark my interest. Like sports. Yeah, sports! Because I like sports and I don't care who knows!]

So yeah. There ya go. Blog #1. (or should I say Blog #ONE...)

[P.S. It took me a solid 17 seconds to realize the unintended pun between the title of this post and the template I used for the blog. Ha.]